Celebration of Life

Celebration of Life - Planning & Ideas

What is a Celebration of Life?

Many families today want a service which celebrates the life of their loved one. We introduce them to the concept of a celebration of life, and provide support in designing a celebration of life that is as unique as the life of their loved one.

We always enjoy working together with families in organizing celebration of life services for their loved one. While it can be a challenge to put together an event that both pays tribute to and celebrates the life and spirit of a complex individual, it's also one of the most rewarding things any one of us can do for someone we've loved and lost.

While celebrations of life are not burdened by social expectations—they can be pretty much anything you want them to be—it's important to realize that the event you're planning should meet the emotional needs of the guests. So, think about exactly who will be there, and what they're likely to want or need. Then, bring in those unique lifestyle and personality characteristics of the deceased; perhaps add live music or refreshments, and you've got the beginnings of a remarkable celebration of life.

Celebrations of Life

Author Barbara Kingsolver, in her book The Poisonwood Bible , wrote “To live is to be marked. To live is to change, to acquire the words of a story, and that is the only celebration we mortals really know.” We think this reflection is at the heart of a celebration of life. While a funeral, as we've described it above, has more to do with the orderly and often spiritually-defined, a celebration-of-life is more concerned with telling the story of the deceased. Celebrations of life are just that: a time people come together more to celebrate the unique personality and achievements of the deceased than to merely witness or mark the change in their social status.

Celebrations of life are similar to memorial services , which can be described as a hybrid event: combining the flexibility of a celebration of life with many of the activities of a traditional funeral order-of-service .

There's more room for creativity in a celebration of life than a funeral or a burial service. Since celebrations of life are commonly held after the individual's physical remains have been cared for through burial or cremation, there is much more time available to plan the event. And without doubt, this allows you to make better decisions about how you'd like to celebrate the life of someone you dearly loved.

If you'd like to know more about the history of funerals in the United States, you may like to visit the website of the National Museum of Funeral History. But for now, it's enough to know that a funeral service traditionally has these three distinct components. Now let's look at a celebration of life service.

Planning a Celebration of Life Service

It's really a process of asking–and answering–questions. Sit down with other family members, at least once—but maybe even more than once—to explore the celebration of life ideas which arise from answering these questions:

Who will be invited? The number of guests define the where, when, and how of your celebration of life. Write down the names of everyone you think would want to be there and then set it aside. You can add new names to the list as you go along.
Where, and when, should the event take place? Here's where your imagination is tempered by any scheduling or travel-related issues facing those who will be invited. Be sure to check in with out-of-town relatives and friends about their situation before settling on these critical details.
Who will orchestrate or conduct the event? If your loved one was religious, you may opt to have their pastor or church minister perform these tasks. However, many families today hire a non-denominational celebrant to oversee the celebration of life.
Who wishes to speak at the event? Many times family members or friends will be very direct about their desire to make a short presentation at the celebration of life; other times you need to come out and ask folks if they would be willing to publicly share their thoughts and feelings. Either way, you'll want to select those people who have shared a close relationship with the deceased and have something meaningful to contribute.
What group activities would be appropriate? We've heard some exciting celebration-of-life ideas over the years. This question involves thinking about what your loved one liked most about their life and gives everyone a remarkable space to share memories, laugh, and even cry together.
What food or beverages should be served? What you serve may depend on the theme of your celebration of life, or may be based on your loved one's favorite dishes. It's entirely up to you; we've even seen "pot luck" celebrations of life where guests actually sign up to bring select foods and beverages.
What readings and music should you include? Music is an integral part of life for many people, and a celebration of life is the perfect event in which to showcase the meaningful music of your loved one's life. But, if your loved one didn't appreciate music (and lots of folks don’t), it may be more appropriate to read chosen spiritual selections, or excerpts from literature.
What details of your loved one's life do you want to share with guests? Not every biographical detail needs to be highlighted; rather you're trying to capture their essence by telling revealing anecdotes or stories. Sometimes you can reveal their character by detailing one short moment in their life experience.
What decorations will you have? Many families create a tribute video and use it as the centerpiece of the event. Others choose to use a memory table of photographs and other memorabilia instead.

Celebration of Life Ideas

Listed below are some unique ideas for celebration of life services.

01 The Musician

Was your loved one a musician or a dedicated fan of a singer/ band? If so, you may want to consider showcasing that particular form of music for their celebration of life. You could consider hosting a small tribute concert in memory of the deceased, where the genre of music they loved can be played.

02 The Foodie

If your loved one enjoyed tasting or trying new recipes, you may want to consider organizing a dinner party that serves their favourite foods. The dinner party can be at someone’s home or at the deceased’s favourite restaurant. Family and friends can then feel connected to the deceased through the food that they loved, as well as being together to share stories and memories of their loved one.

03 The Painter

Maybe your loved one had a passion for painting. If so, you could consider planning a paint night where all of your loved one's friends and family can gather together to each paint a picture in their memory. You could even use your loved one's painting equipment to feel a closer connection. This is a chance for everyone to come together to share memories about your loved one, while also getting a tangible keepsake.

Funeral vs. Celebration of Life

It's interesting; funerals and celebrations of life have much in common, yet they often appear very different. Each is a ceremony; a gathering of people who share a common loss. It's just that one is more rooted in tradition, while the other is the result of recent changes in social values. But both serve to do three things:

Help the bereaved family, and their community, publicly acknowledge the death of one of their own
Support the grieving family by surrounding them with caring friends, co-workers, and neighbors
Move the deceased from one social status to another

Yet they achieve those things in very different ways. First, let's take a closer look at what most of us commonly see as very traditional funerals .

The Funeral

It's not surprising funerals have been around for a very long time. Composed of three activities, the visitation, the funeral service, and the committal service, performed at the graveside; this funeral is the one we'd easily recognize from contemporary literature and film.

Traditional Funeral Services

Let Us Help with the Celebration of Life

We've got years of experience listening, brainstorming, and advising families how they can best pay tribute to a beloved family member. That means we're the perfect people to help you decide between a funeral and a celebration of life. We'll explore your funeral service options with you in detail, taking all the time you need.

In the book Chocolat, by Joanne Harris, you'll find this fundamental truth: “Life is what you celebrate. All of it. Even its end.” As funeral professionals we help families express reverence for life. Let us do that for your family. Call our funeral home to speak with a member of our staff.

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